Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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