I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
