If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
