And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Is it because I queefed?
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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