Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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