i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
