I'm going to jail i love you
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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