do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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