You surviving the open bar?
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I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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