i think my tv is drunk
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
