i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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