i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
