whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
wow bdsm is so cute
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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