it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize