i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
