did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
