Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
our cab driver is having phone sex.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
