brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
