Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
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