I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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