Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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