Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
