No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
