I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
