Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
