You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i came on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
We left an ass print on the piano.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Randomize