she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize