do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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