no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
