Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
so that wasnt chicken after all
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
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