do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize