i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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