I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
