So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize