you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
