"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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