Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Randomize
