after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
