dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
