I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
