I want to make a zoo with you.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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