Your tits are I can't wait for
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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