You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Randomize