they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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