Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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