Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.