1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
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