I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize