I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
