she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
