playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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